What You’ll Discover in Kevin Hogan Body Langauge
Kevin Hogan – Body Langauge
You’re having what you consider to be a pretty important conversation over dinner.
What is the ambience?
Excellent. It’s actually perfect. White candles…just lit, white wine, a few lillies. You look good.
Everything is running smoothly tonight. You couldn’t have asked for better. You were surprised at how well the new suit fit and how well it worked.
You’ve been talking for what seems like 5 minutes. You were on a roll, and you stayed there. You made a vivid scene and you can see that she is present.
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She’s sitting right by you and she goes to give you a kiss. Excellent. She smiles, then returns to her wine and is completely unaware that she’s fixing her hair.
Unconsciously, your behavior mirrors hers.
You don’t even think about it because EVERYTHING is going so perfectly tonight! You smooth your hair.
She knows she is primping. But, for some reason, she immediately feels nervous and uncomfortable.
Your mind is playing with the BIG QUESTION. You just have to say it. You can’t go wrong with that!!
“I think we should go for it.”
You smile a deep heartfelt genuine smile.
She immediately thinks, “NO WAY!”
It’s out of nowhere and she has no idea why she feels that way. She’s a little surprised, but she has come to trust her gut on all things.
She states the response we all say when we are fearful and know we probably shouldn’t be.
“Let me think about it.”
You’re dumbfounded.
90 Miles an Hour … to Instant Stop
Everything was going very well right up to this point.
“Sorry?”
“I said, I’ll think about it.”
You heard it right. She’s going to think about the things she said ten seconds ago. “I definitely want to do that!”
What’s the matter?
Your expression is probably a bit shocked and quizzical.
Instantly, she notices the furrow in your brow and slightly open mouth. Your chin presses to the right while your head tilts slightly to the left.
Now, she has many thoughts. They are all negative.
He thinks I’m being stupid? You are giving me this look! You are a complete jerk.
“What’s wrong?”
Trigger Body Language. istock.com/Moncherie
The tone is not terribly distrusting or hostile, but you’ve just experienced a temperature change of arctic proportions. You get out of it.
“Nothing at all.”
But it’s too late.
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She was certain she would do it ten minutes ago.
Everything has changed.
“When would you like me to call you about it?”
You attempt to recuperate. You weren’t prepared for her chilly response. Now you have to try and capture that warm breeze again, but you intuitively and rightfully know that isn’t going to happen.
Everything moved perfectly. Perfect. Nothing could have gone wrong, but a sinkhole couldn’t have swallowed a car in Chicago faster than she sucked the energy out of your brain.
“Doesn’t matter. Sometime next week I guess,” The temperature continues to drop.
He’s really trying to pressure me. I don’t like it. I’m not sure I even like him. I’m not sure I liked him.
What has really happened?
How can everything go well and then INSTANTLY turn without you ever having said a negative word…or no words at all??!!
The unseen body language signal…
Be careful: You have just sent the FEAR Signal
What could have possibly gone wrong?
Relationship Body Language. You fiddled for 1 second with your hair while you were delivering. “the closing statement.”
She has met thousands of people in her lifetime. She has no idea that her brain has connected people who she’s listening to and the triggers of the one person who lied to her when she smoothed her hair years ago. She doesn’t remember it. She wouldn’t remember it. It’s long buried from consciousness. The Anxiety Trigger, hidden from view, is still there and will continue to be for her entire life.
You did nothing wrong.
Your hair was brushed and she asked you to try it. Her brain went into overdrive with adrenaline, cortisol, and a rush of adrenaline that caused her brain to release adrenaline and cortisol. This changed her nonconscious love to conscious fear and nonconscious liking, and then to conscious fear. She stopped politely backing out and began to hate you.
1 second.
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You couldn’t have known until today.
Now you are aware.
Body Language Signals: Delivering a Message with Elegance & Safety
When you deliver a message that matters, you don’t touch anything. You don’t touch the wine glass. You don’t touch your glasses. You don’t touch the table. You don’t touch a fork. You don’t touch…anything. These are the COMMON FEAR TRIGGERS that people can experience in conversation.
Every day people miss out on opportunities in every area of life because they switch. “yes” To “no” You can use internal triggers.
You just tripped on her “Fear Switch.”
You wouldn’t have meant for it to happen in a million years. Obviously. Her gut, however, directs her brain. In this case her brain is directing it. That means you are listening. “no.”
She’ll go home or visit a friend and explain what happened. She will tell her friend she was rude and unacceptable.
When asked for specifics, she won’t be able to give even one.
“I don’t know, I just got a bad feeling about him. He’s a bit of a jerk.”
“I thought you wanted to go for it with this guy?”
“I did but he blew it. I saw who he really is.”
In one second, the girl switched from experiencing deity to Dante at the Inferno.
I get asked this question all the time. “what are the most important body language signals?”
Answer?
“It’s the one that triggers a cortisol release in the brain. It’s the one that kicks in the fear and anxiety that you couldn’t have known without having watched a video of the person’s life.”
If you’re going to “gesture” It is important to communicate the main idea clearly and be specific.
What’s that mean?
Body Language Fear Triggers
Communication Skills. istockphoto/izusek
Fear triggers that are most frequently experienced include gestures and common fiddling. One person can hear 100 positive things, and 20 negative ones over a year, depending on whether the communicator touches the nose, straightens the hair, touches the lips, rubs the eyes, or scratches the ear. The 20 negatives will outweigh the 100 good things. 100 positives are like 100 goldfish amongst 20 Great White Shark experiences.
Recognizing nonverbal cues is crucial. It can make a big difference.
But the reality is that being aware of YOUR RESPONSE & BEHAVIORS to their nonverbal cues which they then observe, are really where problems begin. This is the most common spot for problems. “yes” To become “no.”
What are some common body language signs that can trip you up?
Learn Body Language: Get it down
You can build trust by mimicking their behavior. It can help create a simple bond. However, it can backfire. This doesn’t happen because someone becomes aware of your mirroring them. It might only happen once in a life time.
It is possible for them to have a negative reaction that was triggered by a cue or gesture you gave, but it’s not conscious. You didn’t know it happened. You didn’t think anything. You didn’t mean anything. You didn’t consciously do anything. You just did what a normal person would do, and it turned out to be one of those.
It goes on.
Body Language Strategy: Acute Awareness
As you observe people’s nonverbal communication, you must be present and IN the present conscious moment. They are not. They could be asked. “Are you here?” They will naturally emerge from nonconsciousness, say and consciousness. “yes.”
The truth is, they are rarely here. You must be present and aware of their behaviors because if you like this person, you’ll naturally yawn when they yawn. This could be a wonderful thing. It is possible to bet on it most of the time.
But…don’t kid yourself into thinking that one person catching another person’s yawn IS a liking signal. It can be. IT MIGHT.
Bodies don’t read popular self-Literature on body language.
They just react to each stimulus. People rarely respond positively.
They can. It is possible. It’s not all that common. For every 100 negative “reactions”There are probably 5 positive reactions.
How is it possible to know the body language cues of people while communicating negatively with someone you are speaking to?
Obviously you can’t, but you and I can make some broad generalizations.
Decoding Body Language: Avoid Negative Gestures
Negative Body Language Signals. istock.com/perkmeup
It’s easy to predict that when someone is pointed out in their life, they will display negative emotions.
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If you look at people with angry faces, you can be sure that they were not feeling good.
This is a challenge I’ve faced. I tend to scowl when I’m intensely focused. My look of determination looks like a lot of people’s “I want to kill you right now,” look.)
It is easy to predict that people will feel negative effects from an increase in volume. You can be certain that passion is perceived as antagonizing by many people. This holds true regardless of what the content is.
Reading Body Language: Brains Are Trigger Dependent
They don’t think. They aren’t thinking right now. They aren’t thinking yet.
They only experience triggers. They certainly do absorb information, but the body’s job is to keep you away from fear. This is the main objective.
Your body will generally seek comfort, food or sex after you have confirmed your mortality.
The key point here is to recognize that you can be emotionally intelligent enough to interpret their reactions to you…and they almost certainly won’t be.
This does not mean that you are out “complete control.” On the contrary, you haven’t seen a complete video of every moment of that person’s life. You don’t know what 100 gestures or cues can be the most negative triggers.
There is no way to be certain which gestures or cues are actually a positive trigger.
Positive feelings can be very beneficial.
Let me now share with you some positive triggers.
Body Language: Triggering positive feelings …
Body Language Strategy: Turn their Fear into Excitement!
Positive Body Language. istock.com/lisegagne
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If you and I have a good time with someone “new”Our conscious mind is much more alert than usual. A conversation with someone who is conscious 10% of time will show that they are in consciousness 30% of the time. It is important to have a higher level of awareness.
When the heart beats faster, it is called “heartbeat faster”. “new people” These are available.
“Excitement” It is often described as “fear” “fear” It is sometimes felt as “excitement” They are basically the same thing.
The difference is the brief checking of the nonconscious-body experience by the conscious mind.
How do you make people consciously experience their life? “fear” As “excitement?”
It is important to get it caught early. It takes approximately one second.
“Cool?!”
“Exciting?!”
“Nice?!”
“Wow!”
Select a word out of an ordinary list. The word must be quickly articulated and the accent on the last letter or sound must be heard with a rising pitch.
If you are with “new people,” We are more present than with our elderly friends. When we get comfortable, we fall back into nonconsciousness and continue to follow the same old behavior patterns.
In this context, returning to nonconsciousness simply means that you return to what has happened in the familiar and comfortable environment. Point? It is not an imminent threat. The brain responds to the mind being distracted or at rest.
Bodies don’t like to be in consciousness because being conscious requires the experience of STRESS.
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Body Predictably Positive Language Signals
OK, can you think of another positive body language triggers?
Keep in mind that everyone is unique. There are other cues that can be used to predict positive outcomes.
This should be the focus of every conversation.
Your face should be closer to the ground so that your eyes can see the ground. This will make it easier for them to feel control, comfort, and maybe even feelings of love, connection and love.
Why?
Positive Body Language. Itock.com/lovleah In your earliest years, your Dad or Mom probably looked down at you when you spoke to them. If you had a crummy Mom or Dad, this probably didn’t happen, but most people have generally positive experiences with adults when their face is at their level or lower.
I don’t need to hang out with enough 5-Year olds like me, but they are usually year olds. I can’t shake them.
Why? Because I immediately get to work. “their level” Live in their world. Adults don’t do this, which is why kids talk to a lot of thighs when they are little. Aside from their big stomach, they only can see the chin, nose, and some hair if they’re close enough to an adult. The upsides of thighs are not for children. Thighs are not a good place to express love, connection, and empathy.
The few who get down to the level a child can be found? They are generally liked.
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Adults can do the same.
If you can bring your eyes to a plane that is closer to the ground than theirs, you’ll PROBABLY trigger positive feelings.
Probably.
Take a look at these:
When one person is able to dominate another, it does little good. That factor is the most common negative trigger. The majority of negative triggers are non-existent.-Negative triggers include people being below their eye level.
If you’re 6’ 5” and she is 5’ 6” you have your work cut out for you.
In cases like this, physical distance from the other person can be slightly increased so that you don’t appear to be an adult to their child, even if they are 40.
Next week, we’ll talk about more cues and clues to nonverbal experience both from your point of view and theirs so you can optimize each interaction and cause as many positive feelings as possible while bringing out fewer negative reactions.
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These are the things you should be doing Body Language Mistakes
According to studies, you only have 4 seconds to make an impression on people you meet. This is the standard for future communication with those you meet.
Within the first four seconds people will judge you and say something about yourself.
This person is not someone I would buy from.
This person is someone I like.
I find this person to be kind (or not).
This person is intelligent to me.
You can’t make a good first impression through your words alone. The impact of communication is 60-75% nonverbally. Nonverbal communication, despite being the most important aspect of communication, is also one of the most misunderstood or misinterpreted.
Every action – or even the smallest micro-action – communicates subconsciously to others, so people could like (or not like) you through your gestures… without even knowing exactly why.
You could be making the most wonderful compliments or praise to people, but it’s difficult to gain their trust or approval if your words contradict your nonverbals.
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These photos of body language will demonstrate some of the advanced and basic techniques that are used to understand nonverbal communication. This girl is flirting. “But her arms are crossed, that’s defensive,” Some might argue otherwise. They are wrong. She tilts her head to her left and smiles at you with a big smile. She loves you.
Flirting and sexual body language is something you can quickly spot in a woman’s nonverbal communication in both business and personal contexts.
If you are able to read the signs correctly, it is easy to identify the liar in business or personal situations. I’ll show you this later.
Kevin Hogan Nonverbal Communication ExpertIf you are interested in learning the nonverbal secrets to love, romance, and closing the deal, we welcome you! The analysis I’m going to give you as part of this preview includes both “liking” Deception judgments. It can be difficult to analyse human behavior in snapshots of time.
This guy is a great example of what you can see. By looking at him, that smirk should mean he’s being perceived poorly and he’s fighting for his life. The first girl’s look at him from the side is not what you would expect. Women inspect over their shoulders with curiosity…until that split second where liking or not occurs. These two will connect…
I want you to be able to see a few cues in this preview.
You will discover a lot about nonverbal communication if you pay attention.
What if you could learn to be a master?
Once “armed” with the insights you’re going to learn shortly, you have an overpowering edge in life. If I hadn’t learned nonverbal communication, I wouldn’t have been able to achieve what I have. It’s certainly a key component to the success I’ve experienced.
People often refer to my ability recognize hesitations, likes, deception, honesty and others. This is something that I have learned to teach others. You can show me a video of someone today, and another video of the same person before some horrible event (a crime), and I will often be able to tell with great accuracy if they are innocent or guilty. I’ll show you how.
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I’m also able to send covert messages (through movements and gestures) that generate liking from other people that almost no one knows how to do. I’ll show you how to do this as well.
Now you have the chance to learn my deepest secrets and use them to your advantage in life.
These are the things I will tell you. “accomplishments,” only to share with you that I’ve taught thousands of others and I will show you how to use this skill set to achieve great results in life.
I feel fortunate that I’ve gained the trust and respect of the most reputable people and media outlets in the world.
And now, you can leverage that knowledge and years of experience to have the skills of a specialist in nonverbal communication… in almost no time flat!
I’ve been educated to know what really works. Through 20 years of rigorous scientific research, studies, practice, I’ve personally experienced it all.
You can count on me for the best steps to help you shave years off your learning curve and uncover hidden messages like an expert.-By-Step-by-step training towards nonverbal mastery
The Complete Body Language Home Study Course
Kevin Hogan’s Body Language CD/DVD program
If you want to get the same training as my seminar attendees at the comfort and privacy of your own home – at a tiny fraction of they are paying- then you’ll be quite pleased with the Complete Body Language Home Study Courses on CD/DVD, and Online
This program is designed to help you understand nonverbal communication and to make it more efficient and accurate. In most cases, you can read the REAL signs of liking, disliking, honesty or deception… in less than 10 seconds, with significant accuracy.
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It’s designed for the benefit of both business and personal relationships. Why? Because the nonconscious mind, which directs almost all nonverbal communication, doesn’t know if you are at the office or in the kitchen. It reacts.
I made the scientific aspects of nonverbal communication foolproof by creating a system that works for anyone.-An understanding year-old can understand. In this program, I’ll walk you step-By-You will be guided through each step. I’ll teach you all the key secrets of nonverbal communication to skyrocket your sales, get your dream date, enjoy satisfying relationships, and be successful in your daily interactions with people.
I’ll reveal to you how to determine whether someone likes you or not. I’ll show you how to read with precision whether they are leaning towards a “yes” Or, “no.” It takes time to learn, just like any other skill.
The payoff? Enormous. The ability to control all situations.
In this course, we’ll analyze over 100 candid photos of celebrity couples in different settings. From the tilt of the head to where the the feet are pointed, you’ll know exactly what they’re thinking or feeling.
Celebrity photos are the best way to learn, as they are hard to read. They play roles that appeal and are always interesting to the public. “on”). But just like what you have already learned to see, the little cues tell quite a story – the story that the nonconscious is revealing, but the conscious mind is not.
Recently, it was reported that 46 of 48 times I was correct in interpreting the nonverbal communication of Hollywood couples as to whether they would end up splitting within the next two-years. This feat has never been achieved. They are very difficult people. “act out” To seek public approval.
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Here’s What You Will Get In Kevin Hogan – Body Langauge
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